Robert Jenrick: An Apology
The worst man in Britain finds a way to get even worse
I should begin with an apology. Last month, I described Robert Jenrick as “the most shameless man in parliament”. His office complained at the time, but I was stubborn and refused to back down. Well, it’s never too late to say you were wrong. Robert Jenrick is not simply the most shameless man in parliament. He is the most shameless man in Britain, the most shameless man on Earth. Quite possibly the most shameless man in history. It is not simply that Jenrick has no shame. He is like a black hole for shame, sucking in the embarrassment of people around him. Which will be quite handy in his new party, Reform.
Nothing became Jenrick’s time in the Conservative Party so much as the leaving of it. For years he had eased his way up the greasy pole, switching positions when necessary, a heating-seeking missile for whichever pose could help him advance, poster boy for the importance of self-belief over ability or integrity. And finally he was undone because he forgot to pick something up off a printer.
A rare Thursday sketch, because, well, BLOODY HELL, JENRICK! But it gives me a chance to remind anyone interested that this week’s episode of War Movie Theatre is on The Cockleshell Heroes, a funny little film that turns out to be part of the history of James Bond. You can listen everywhere podcasts are downloaded, or here.
Only a Lobby Journo, in this case the Guardian, could look at this man, with this background and this event and decide to frame their story around how Ruthless Jenrick is
I mean when was the last time that journalist met a normal human being?
Brilliant takedown of someone who's basically a political weather vane. The "black hole for shame" metaphor is spot-on because it captures how Jenrick doesn't just lack principles, he somehow makes everyone around him complicit in the cynicism. I remeber watching politicians like this in local councils before they scaled up, always chasing whatever looked like the next big oppurtunity. The Reform switch feels almost inevitable once you frame it that way.